The Quixotic Jedi

Photo

Thu, 23 Feb 2012 17:33:44 -0500

Kinda like this guy. Heck, the rest of the site is good too:...

Thu, 05 Jan 2012 15:22:17 -0500

Kinda like this guy. Heck, the rest of the site is good too: http://lookslikegooddesign.com/; think I might have finally found a source of office artwork. (Thx Claire.)

factsandchicks: Submitted by Tom Lovett

Thu, 05 Jan 2012 14:49:29 -0500

factsandchicks:

Submitted by Tom Lovett

i am your canadian boyfriend: Monkeys

Thu, 05 Jan 2012 14:38:51 -0500

i am your canadian boyfriend: Monkeys:

atsween:

I was thinking about monkeys and how I really like them but then I remembered the Nazi monkey in Raiders of the Lost Ark and I was conflicted because I didn’t know if he was a true believer or if he was just following orders and then I felt bad because that’s no excuse but then I remembered he…

Photo

Thu, 05 Jan 2012 14:37:00 -0500

Good eyes, Josh Allen. fireland: The Paramount continues to do...

Mon, 07 Nov 2011 11:20:42 -0500

Good eyes, Josh Allen.

fireland:

The Paramount continues to do whatever the hell it feels like.

[previously]

Jawbone Launches the Up: Will This $99 Wristband Rule Your Life?

Thu, 03 Nov 2011 00:04:21 -0400

Jawbone Launches the Up: Will This $99 Wristband Rule Your Life?:

Interesting.

Five Minute Break (Taken with instagram)

Sat, 01 Oct 2011 12:16:32 -0400

Five Minute Break (Taken with instagram)

Fricked

Mon, 22 Aug 2011 19:30:10 -0400

Fricked:

Ok, here’s my submission for the #nycmidnight Flash Fiction Challenge 2011. 1,000 word maximum (I’m at 999); the prompts were sci-fi (genre), a wig (object), a drug rehab (place). Not the best…

“Crayon Eater.” Nice. aryeo: James Jean tattoo by...

Thu, 21 Jul 2011 11:29:46 -0400

“Crayon Eater.” Nice.

aryeo:

James Jean tattoo by Shawn Barber? This is my dream come true.

fireland: I’m still working from home doing freelance writing,...

Thu, 21 Jul 2011 09:05:24 -0400

fireland:

I’m still working from home doing freelance writing, still showering … irregularly, still basically Martin Sheen at the beginning of Apocalypse Now.

Anyway I thought I’d put the word out that I’m looking for more writing work, freelance or otherwise. So I made a little All About Meeeeee! page with some details, and an animated gif if you get bored halfway through.

If you know someone who might need my prose stylings, please direct them here: joshua-allen dot com

Thank you!

Fireland: Twitter First Draft No. 006

Thu, 14 Jul 2011 15:24:54 -0400

Fireland: Twitter First Draft No. 006:

fireland:

Last night I went against my better judgment and wrote a Harry Potter tweet. It relied too much on knowing Harry Potter stuff to get the “joke” but whatever, the Venn diagram of Harry Potter people and Twitter people is basically a big fat zero. But before I got to the final draft I went over…

fireland: So I’m going to make my own tortillas because I’m...

Fri, 24 Jun 2011 09:53:41 -0400

fireland:

So I’m going to make my own tortillas because I’m basically the real deal as well as the complete package. The downside was having to buy lard. The upside was this little interaction at the grocery store:

CLERK: Lard, huh.

ME: Laaaaaard.

CLERK: Straight up lard.

ME: No chaser.

CLERK: You’re buying a pound of fucking lard.

ME: I’m not even gonna eat it.

CLERK: What are y—

ME: I’m gonna use it. For things.

CLERK: Super. Don’t forget to blog about it.

ME: [Laughs uproariously at the very idea of forgetting to blog about it]

Sans Motivation

Tue, 21 Jun 2011 18:12:27 -0400

Sans Motivation:

Hoo boy. It’s been 84 days since my last post. That’s exactly 12 weeks. Whoops. Sorry ’bout that, dear reader.

Ok, you’re over it.

Quixotic Jedi mind trick.

Seriously.

I’m at work right…

Taken with instagram

Sat, 28 May 2011 17:57:09 -0400

Taken with instagram

Trying to figure out if this pic of Steve Martin gives me a...

Tue, 24 May 2011 13:03:53 -0400

Trying to figure out if this pic of Steve Martin gives me a boner too. Maybe. I’d sure as hell be cool with chillin’ with this emeffer.

fireland:

Yesterday my mother quietly, sadly told me that my stepfather wore a bear claw necklace in the 70s, and that made me think of this picture of Steve Martin, and that gave me the weirdest boner.

Ten Sexy Ladies: This Sharpie

Wed, 18 May 2011 10:47:14 -0400

Ten Sexy Ladies: This Sharpie:

The genitalia/powerpoint thing sorta sounds like me, too.

tensexyladies:

I’m in my cubicle and decide to take a little break from providing value to draw a picture of Boba Fett on my desk with a Sharpie. I’m not good at drawing hands or legs or feet or Boba Fett so I have him hiding in a dumpster, which I can sort of draw. As I ponder my art with avuncular fondness, I…

Fireland: It's Wednesday So You Know What That Means

Thu, 05 May 2011 12:09:14 -0400

Fireland: It's Wednesday So You Know What That Means:

May the 4th be with you.

fireland:

[This is old but I’m tired of writing new stuff and anyway it’s Star Wars-y.]

- - -

“Princess Leia! You will tell me the location of your hidden rebel base! I bet it’s in your panties!”

“Please don’t use that word.”

“That’s it! Bring in … the probe droid.”

“Hang on a sec.”

“What’s a…

Photo

Fri, 01 Apr 2011 11:14:35 -0400

Ten Sexy Ladies: Thomas Jefferson

Tue, 29 Mar 2011 15:09:12 -0400

Ten Sexy Ladies: Thomas Jefferson:

tensexyladies:

T-Jeff looks a little like Robert Redford and a lot like a big slab of hot hunk, you ask me. I mean you know he was a full-on player. He had all kinds of fillies on the side. There were at least a couple dozen slave kids running around Monticello with his face. But when you’re sporting a kisser…